503

So when was the last time I wrote up anything? Maybe a coupla days, right? You see, I’ve been working these past 2 days, on my off-days, so I’ve been too lazy and tired to start up the old computer and write anything.

Yesterday I broke my fast with Ayeen in IKEA. For every 10 bucks you spend, you get some traditional buka puasa kuih or something like that. And we got three, so you can imagine how much food there was on the table. hehe.

I’ve only smoked around 5 or 6 ciggies in the past 3 days, which is something of a record for me.
Sigh, I’ve run outta things to talk about. In the next post (tomorrow or whenever), I’ll talk about how I got started in Magic.

Till then,
Baalan.

Hey guys.

I know nobody’s read my blog much, but I just want to be regularly posting, you know, so that I get into the habit. I just got home from work, had my dinner, now I’m in front of the PC. So here I am, going at another attempt at blogging.

So yesterday Ayeen and I went to Port Klang for a late lunch/early dinner. I know a lot of you folks probably go to the Muara area, but I don’t like that place. As a matter of fact, I think the food is crap. Even crap would taste better (not that I’ve had any, haha). You see, if you go to the Muara Restaurant (or whatever the hell it’s called), you have to turn to the right. Now, to get to where I usually eat, instead of turning right, turn left. Stop at the first restaurant you see; its called Sea Sky Restaurant. Its a chinese restaurant, and they got the BEST seafood ever. Ever.

This is what we had:
1. Dry Curry Mud Crab
2. Steamed Prawns in Egg White
3. Curry Fried Clams
4. Four Seasons Dish:
    - chili fried japanese snail
    - calamari kerabu
    - fried seafood pieces in batter
    - honey-fried baby squid

I know that sounds like a lot, but we’d been saving our stomachs for a big meal, and believe it or not, we finished it off! I was so bloody full, I couldn’t even breathe haha!

While we’re on the topic of food, tomorrow we’re gonna start the Ramadhan. The fasting month is going to be a good month as any to try and start losing weight, maybe quit smoking (!!!)…
I’m not going to promise anything except that I will promise to try.

Anyways, I’d like to take this opportunity to wish everyone SELAMAT BERPUASA. God Bless all of you.

yours,
Baalan.

Courtesy of my brother Edwan. He probably got it from some website somewhere. These are hilarious! Hahaha!

Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone!

Yo mama so fat her blood type is rock and roll!

Yo mama so fat that when she went to a buffet she got a group discount!

Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors!

Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world!

Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she goes down straight to hell!

Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!

Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington’s nose.

Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"

Yo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order!

Yo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!

Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

Yo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!

Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!

Yo mama so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes!

Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!

Yo mama so greasy Petronas buys Oil from her! (Hahaha I love this one - 503.)

Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her.

Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.

Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died. (hahahaha! -503.)

Yo mama so old her social security number is 1!

Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class.

Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.

Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

Yo mama so old she owes Jesus three dollars

Yo mama so old when God said ‘let there be light’ she flicked on the switch

Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it.

Thanks, Adik.

Hmmm. So this is what it feels like to be blogging. I wonder why I haven’t really gotten around to writing down details of my life for the whole world to read. Maybe it’s because my life isn’t very interesting anyway: work, sleep, eat, magic; but not necessarily in that order.

Right, so to anyone who might chance upon this page, I’d like to say hello and welcome. Maybe I’ll even start reading some of your blogs someday. Nah, this probably won’t happen. What do I care for other people? Haha, I’m joking. Not about the "not-reading-your-blog" thing, though; I probably won’t read blogs. I don’t even think my own blog is going to last long. I’m sure I’m going to lose interest in all this in a month or so, then totally stop writing anything.

But as long as I’m still in the habit of writing, here’s a list of what I think will most likely be jotted down in these pages :

1. The Art of Magic
     - There will be a lot of Magic in here. I’m a passionate magician, and I’ll tell you guys about any gigs I get, people’s reactions from my magic, what I actually learn from performing, etc.

2. Complaints/Rambling
     - I admit, I’m a whiner. I love to ramble and rage about anything and everything. So if you see your name being fucked here, I apologize beforehand.

3. My Daily Goings-On
    - Probably won’t be much of this, but I’ll just describe what I did during the day. Should be pretty boring anyway.

Okay, I hope tomorrow I’ll have something to write about. I’m planning to go to Port Klang for dinner with my lovely Ayeen. Should be back with some nice stories about food.

Till tomorrow,
BAALAN.